Be Smart; Spend Money On Ski Clothing Rather Than Actual Skiing Gear
For anybody who’s taken their life in their hands and decided to strap two wood and fiberglass pieces of board to their feet and then careen down a hill, arms windmilling wildly only to strike a tree at about 700 miles an hour, there’s actually something attractive that could come out of it. Looking good can be better than being good when it comes to skiing, so consider fashion before skiing lessons.
Think about things for a minute; Alpine skiing usually involves careening like a madman down the slope and on Alpine skiing equipment that costs literally hundreds and even thousands of dollars. Now; most ski resorts rent that stuff and at a price that’s bound to be less than the three-month hospital stay that usually occurs after improper Alpine skiing is done by folks who have no business on slick wooden boards and snow.
That’s why spending the money for the rental gear and then spending the real money on the clothing that can help one look like an Olympic gold medal-winning downhill skier is probably the smarter move. Don’t worry about being laughed at while skiing all day on the bunny slope, because those peasants don’t get that their lives are in danger every second they’re on a hill higher than 2 feet.
Still, spending a little dough on a nice black sport watch that’s timed to chime when happy hour over at the chalet is set to begin is probably worth all of the accolades that might be thrown one’s way after skiing down a black diamond slope, though one was actually looking for the restroom at the top of the lift. Of course, ‘skiing down’ implies actually doing so deliberately. ‘Falling down’ was actually what happened.
Much of this obsession with skiing is also why it’ll be a pretty smart idea to get a black helmet for wear while tumbling (which is actually the word that should be substituted for ‘skiing, ‘ in most peoples’ cases) down a slope; it’ll hide all the dents that one took to the noggin while running into other skiers and more than a few trees. The ski patrol will certainly be appreciative, at least.
The biggest secret when it comes to skiing is to realize that humans weren’t made to go hurtling down K2 at near-lightspeed and slick and icy frozen water crystals. In fact, it’s a pretty good bet that the whole sport was thought up by some ancient Greek god who liked to see humans fall down into funny lumps on the stuff. Truly, the gods have no pity!
In the end, it’s probably best to spend the bucks buying good-looking clothing that’ll also look good at the clubhouse while all of that rental ski gear sits outside, collecting ice and snow while the hot toddies are being poured inside. What’s the point of going to a ski resort, after all, if the only thing to do is to ski?
Mountain Song, 1971 – Garcia, Crosby, Slick & Kantner
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